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Dealing With Betrayal In Relationships

When you discover betrayal in relationships it is surely a sign that they are over and that it’s time to break up with someone. It’s a hard thing to do and I know people tend to advocate forgiveness, but if you can’t count on someone, it’s either a sign that they don’t know you well enough to know what you expect from them or they don’t care enough to respect you. In either case, it’s a pretty serious sign of incompatibility and you should probably think about finding someone with whom you are compatible. Matchmaking sites are a really good way to look for that special someone who can really compliment your personality and with whom you can hook up with for the long haul.

I know that it’s a big jump to go from betrayal in relationships to suggesting places to find a new match. I’m not suggesting you do both on the same day. Looking for love on the rebound can be a really risky idea and, of course, it can take some time to get over a relationship.

The reason I jumped to the subject of matchmaking is that I find people tend to make the same mistakes over and over again. Either we don’t learn or we forget, but in either case we end up dating the same kinds of people and make ourselves unhappy all over again. I think it’s important to think proactively about ways to break the cycle.

I want to be clear: I’m not suggesting that it’s your fault if you find yourself betrayed. Someone made a conscious choice and you’re not responsible for that. On the other hand, as mysterious as people’s motivations can be and as deceptive as they can be, people don’t tend to do things that are out of character. What one person perceives is inherently a betrayal will not stand for all people. If you find someone with a similar outlook and with a comparable moral compass you won’t be as likely to be surprised by how they behave or what they’re willing to compromise. Maybe I’m being overly analytical, but I think there is some truth to what I’m saying.

The thing that makes matchmaking sites standout from other dating personals is that they force you to think a little more critically about who you are and what it is you really want in a partner. The things that you find initially attractive in someone aren’t necessarily the qualities that will make you compatible in the long run, so it might be a good idea to start the process within a framework that is geared to a more long-term approach.

Source: Dealing With Betrayal In Relationships

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